- Jerry My father was an abysnant, my grandmother was an abysnant. If that’s what you’re looking for, go live with a car battery.” -Erma Bombeck. “I have a lot of growing up to do. 20,724 points • 1 comments. '” ~ Dave Barry. Jerry Seinfeld quotes: memorable stuff from comedy king, Mr. Jerry Seinfeld. I was the best man at the wedding. There is no such thing as a stupid question. Summary of Seinfeld. All Jerry Seinfeld. It's also a much catchier saying than "Hoochie mama!" Seinfeld Quotes Which are Full of Funny and Inspiring Jokes 1. My dad [baseball pitcher Chuck Finley] said at the service that she knew no stranger. Jerry and Elaine - Funny. For those of you who are less fanatical about it than I am (which is a bit disappointing, as an aside), you might not realize that it serves as an incredibly accurate blueprint of human behavior. Aug 10, 2016 - The Best (& Funniest) Show About Nothing. – Rodney Dangerfield. For some heartfelt laughs, jump right into these 25 hilarious Jerry Seinfeld quotes. 9 Shrinkage I don't know how you guys walk around with those things. Wait 'til he hears we're going to the library. Tv Quotes. Jerry Seinfeld. See more ideas about seinfeld, seinfeld quotes, seinfeld funny. In this article, we bring you some of the best Seinfeld quotes that you would love to quote yourself, both from the TV show and of Jerry Seinfeld himself. Elaine-Dingo ate your baby. Jerry Seinfeld Quotes A collection of quotes and thoughts by Jerry Seinfeld on funny, one-liner, marriage, wedding-toast, catchphrase, top, life, reason, thinking, evidence, love and laugh. - Frank Costanza (Jerry Stiller) from Seinfeld 30. Jerry Seinfeld My whole life is a sham.-George. Some of the funniest quotes by Jerry Seinfeld are listed below. If I had a child, I would name it isósceles. What is a date really, but a job interview that lasts all night? I come from a long line of desisting. Airline hostesses show you how to use a seatbelt in case you haven't been in a car since 1965. "When you look annoyed all the time, people think you're busy." Funny, Humor, Be Kind. If I'm the best man, why is she marrying him? Seinfeld was created by Larry David and Jerry Seinfeld, and aired for 9 seasons from 1989-1998. I found there was only one way to look thin: hang out with fat people. Jerry Seinfeld, a generation’s favourite stand-up comedian turns 67 today. 0. "The comedy universe is a swamp of madness." K. Katie S. The thing that keeps you from really enjoying it is the maintenance.” ~ Jerry Seinfeld. Jerry Seinfeld quotes “The Four Levels of Comedy: Make your friends laugh, Make strangers laugh, Get paid to make strangers laugh, and Make people talk … "Being a good husband is like being a stand-up comic. Here are the 10 Funniest Jerry Seinfeld Quotes. Jerry Seinfeld Quotes - A two-year-old is kind of like having a blender, but you don't have a top for it. That really improves the already wonderful life that I have: People … I could easily survive on that.”. Below are some amazing Jerry Seinfeld quotes that are also pretty brilliant words of wisdom about life (and sprinkled in are some funny ones just to make you laugh!). To live is to keep moving. All JERRY SEINFELD Quotes about “Funny” “It's amazing that the amount of news that happens in the world every day always just exactly fits the newspaper.” “That's the true spirit of Christmas; people being helped by people other than me.” So, on his 62nd birthday, we give you some of his best and funniest quotes. Jerry Seinfeld. Funny Quotes of Wit and Wisdom. My dad [baseball pitcher Chuck Finley] said at the service that she knew no stranger. Similar Quotes. Quote of the Day to Make you Laugh. All JERRY SEINFELD Quotes about “Funny” “It's amazing that the amount of news that happens in the world every day always just exactly fits the newspaper.” “That's the true spirit of Christmas; people being helped by people other than me.” Jerry: (as the horse) "Chill out, Hopalong, I know the trail. Seinfeld is one of the funniest television series of all-time. Jerry Seinfeld. Yeah, and I really appreciate you kickin' me while I'm taking a leak. 1. I tried it at a nightclub and it got a huge laugh.” Andrew Toth via Getty Images Sascha, Jerry and Jessica Seinfeld at a Good+ Foundation event in 2018. If you can't be kind, at least have the decency to be vague. A few of the funny quotes from the greatest T.V. See more ideas about seinfeld quotes, seinfeld, funny shows. - Jerry Seinfeld 02. of 20. In this article, we bring you some of the best Seinfeld quotes that you would love to quote yourself, both from the TV show and of Jerry Seinfeld himself. That’s how you know you’re still alive. Everyone says that when you met her, it felt like you’d known her for a lifetime. The sea was angry that day, my friends, like an old man trying to send back soup in a deli… - George. If I'm the best man, why is she marrying him? Funny Quotes From Seinfeld. "We are even … She was more than what you saw on TV. Jerry Seinfeld. 30 Best Jerry Seinfeld Quotes. Jerry Seinfeld is known primarily for his 90’s hit TV series. Get belly busting laughs with these printable funny quotes. You're funny, I'm interested. “You’re a nice guy, but I actually only have three friends. You will surely love these hilarious and a little bit sarcastic quotes. A few of the funny quotes from the greatest T.V. 3. In 2010, he premiered a reality series called The Marriage Ref. Water. Health Psychology Computers Internet Brain Drupal MySQL Reference Software Quotes TimothyFerriss Ads Condoms Durex Funny Men Products MythBusters TV DalaiLama Life Philosophy Scrubs Videos Fastball Lyrics Music Society Craigslist Authors GregoryBateson. Customize. - George à ¢ â € ¬ Å "I love the name à ¢ â €" Esesceles. Great to share with your friends and family. I've driven women to lesbianism before, but never a mental institution.-George. Explore some of Jerry Seinfeld best quotations and sayings on Quotes.net -- such as 'My mom was so amazing, she was a great sister, friend and artist. ... Jerry Seinfeld Quotes. I lie every second of the day. Happy birthday, Jerry Seinfeld. “I remember thinking, “Well, but I wouldn’t have to be that funny anyway. Jerry Seinfeld. 2. I think if you've got a T-shirt with a bloodstain all over it, maybe laundry isn't your biggest problem.Maybe you should get rid of the body before you do the wash.” Jenny0103 Jerry Seinfeld quote Similar Quotes. Adventure Time Anime. “I didn’t know every day I would be discussing the tone of my voice with my wife. Jerry Seinfeld Quotes - Page 2 - BrainyQuote. A young woman's strange erotic journey from Milan to Minsk. I was raised to give up. Lisa Lake/Getty Images There [are] just two things I’d need to find out everything I … Here are 45 funny life quotes by some well-known funny men and women on life that will enthuse you. Funny Quotes Jerry Seinfeld. It's one of the few things I do well. Corkscrews. Kramer: You know, I never got a library card. South Park. I was the best man at the wedding. but it’s also responsible for some of the most notable quotes that we still use today, like “sponge-worthy,” “yada yada yada” or “no soup for you!” For a show that was supposed to be about nothing, it … I would just have to be funny enough to buy a loaf of Wonder bread and a jar of Skippy peanut butter a week.”. Top Gear. About: Funny quotes. 87. "Rochelle, Rochelle" now playing at the Paradise Twin. Print Now! On the occasion of his 67th birthday, let's hear some of Jerry Seinfeld's quotes and sayings on the NBC situational-comedy Seinfeld. It's amazing that the amount of news that happens in the world every day always just exactly fits the newspaper. -Elaine. Explore some of Jerry Seinfeld best quotations and sayings on Quotes.net -- such as 'My mom was so amazing, she was a great sister, friend and artist. Seinfeld is arguably one of the funniest sitcoms ever, and inarguably one of the best quote-able comedies of all time. Airline hostesses show you how to use a seatbelt in case you haven't been in a car since 1965. -George. The network offered Jerry Seinfeld $110 Million dollars for a tenth season of Seinfeld and he turned them down – he said that he found out nine in numerology meant completion. They just looked at me and they went, ‘Dad, that’s not funny at all.’ They were wrong. show ever created as well as some of my favorite movie quotes George-Answering Machine. Elaine-Dingo ate your baby. “If love is the answer, could you rephrase the question.”-Lily Tomlin. Brooke Hendrick. 76 Copy quote. —Jerry Seinfeld. Note: If you have suggestions for some funny quotes, please let us know via the Contact page. Seinfeld's observational humour, besides being rib-tickling, gives heart to everyone who is anal and obsessive about the tiny things that we experience while socialising. See more ideas about seinfeld, seinfeld quotes, seinfeld funny. Feb 16, 2017 - It's a show about nothing. ― Jerry Seinfeld tags: humor 122 likes Like “If I want a long boring story with no point to it, I have my life.” ― Jerry Seinfeld 118 likes Like “A two-year old is kind of like having a blender, but you don't have a top for it.” ― Jerry Seinfeld 115 likes Like “Why do people give each other flowers? "You know its not fair that people are seated first-come, first-served. Seinfeld is one of the funniest television series of all-time. But he’s really taken an interest in marriage and family life over the last decade as he’s “matured”, and has his own Seinfeldian viewpoint on these issues near and dear to our hearts: 1. "Being a good husband is like being a stand-up comic. George Costanza Quotes From 'Seinfeld' Episode 13 of season seven shows that George Costanza wants to name his future child 'Seven,' with his fiancee Susan, which she is not ready to do. 1. Jerry Seinfeld. Larry David and Jerry Seinfeld are comedic masterminds during this series run (Larry actually continues his genius later on with the comedy Curb Your Enthusiasm).Sadly, Jerry hasn't been able to do much of anything besides commercials and starting a few other shows which were … Jerry Seinfeld When someone does a small task beautifully, their whole environment is affected by it. Best Funny Work Quotes. One of the funniest aspects of Seinfeld was the way they explored how men and women understood (or failed to understand) the opposite sex. “The human body is like a condominium. A bank is a place where they lend you an umbrella in fair weather and ask for it back when it begins to rain. 16 Copy quote. 3. Jeff Kravitz/Getty Images "Having a 2 year-old is like having a blender, but you dont' have a top for it." It not only introduced us to four of the zaniest characters ever written (hello Jerry, Elaine, George and Kramer!) Quote from Kramer. Reading these quotes will jog your memory on not only the episodes they were from but the endless laughs that the show provided you. And because it’s odorless, why, it will be our little secret.” – Kramer 2. Jerry Seinfeld 1954- , American comedian American comedian, actor, writer, producer and director who is best known for portraying a semifictional version of himself in the sitcom Seinfeld (1989-1998) on NBC. Correct this quote. Movie Co. Jerry Seinfeld Inspired Quote Poster by outnerdme on DeviantArt. 86. Sometimes his jokes are just practical. On Figuring Out Parenthood “There really needs to be better instructions. Marriage is like a game of chess except the board is flowing water, the pieces are made of smoke and no move you make will have any effect on the outcome. Jerry: It's George. France Jokes and Funny Quotes About France. You need ten years before you can call yourself a beginner." ... 13 Funny Quotes to Keep Fights Off the Thanksgiving Table. “If you had to identify, in one word, the reason why the human race has not achieved, and never will achieve, its full potential, that word would be ‘meetings. It becomes funniest every time Frank shouts the phrase in his very uncalming way. Find funny, famous quotes from Jerry Seinfeld, George Costanza, Elaine Benes, Cosmo Kramer and yada, yada, yada. Yeah, I'm here every Goddamn day. Elaine, breaking up is like knocking over a Coke machine. Thanks. Sarah Palin Jokes. 16 Copy quote. Jerry Seinfeld quotes,Jerry, Seinfeld, author, authors, writer, writers, people, famous people. I can sit and look at it for hours.” ~ Jerome K. Jerome. Cartoon Network Adventure Time. Seinfeld was heavily involved in Bee Movie, in which he voiced its protagonist. Jerry Seinfeld “You can tell what was the best year of your father’s life because they seem to freeze that clothing style and ride it out.” —Jerry Seinfeld RELATED: Dad Quotes Jerome Allen "Jerry" Seinfeld is an American comedian, actor, writer, producer, and director. … Jerry Seinfeld is known primarily for his 90’s hit TV series. 0. American - Comedian Born: April 29, 1954. Jerry Seinfeld Funny is the world I live in. Jerry Seinfeld. Best Jerry Seinfeld Quotes. Jan 28, 2020 - The best Seinfeld memes and quotes on the internet!. Why not celebrate this beloved show’s anniversary by reading some of the funniest Jerry Seinfeld quotes? You have to motivate yourself with challenges. “Marriage is our last, best chance to grow up.”. show ever created as well as some of my favorite movie quotes George-Answering Machine. You can’t do it in one push; you gotta rock it back and forth a few times and then it goes over.-Jerry. We have a variety of funny quotes from many comedians, authors and writers. Jerry Seinfeld “You can tell what was the best year of your father’s life because they seem to freeze that clothing style and ride it out.” —Jerry Seinfeld RELATED: Dad Quotes I was the best man at the wedding. Everyone says that when you met her, it felt like you’d known her for a lifetime. Don't Have A Square To Spare Seinfeld Quote / Elaine Benes Quotes / Funny Bathroom Sign / Jerry Seinfeld Printables / Seinfeld Art Print JenniferRoseDigitals 5 out of 5 stars (23) $ 5.70. Seinfeld is, of course, the best show of all time (to quote Poppy, quite fittingly, “On this issue there’s no debate!”). Funny Marriage Quotes. Simply download and print. Seinfeld TV quotes funny quotes jerry seinfeld comedy movie quotes. 0. “Keep your head up in failure and your head down in success.”. My Account Help: Add the "Dynamic Daily Quotation" to Your Site or Blog - it's Easy! If I can't, it's not gonna make the team. About: Funny quotes , Family quotes , Law and lawyers quotes , Parents quotes , Comedy quotes . Shop funny quotes seinfeld jerry-seinfeld notebooks designed by AsKartongs as well as other jerry-seinfeld merchandise at TeePublic. Thanks a lot. It doesn't really bother me. “Men want the same thing from their underwear that they want from women: a little bit of support, and a little bit of freedom.” ~ Jerry Seinfeld. Grab your morning cup of coffee, read them, and start to live your life the “Seinfeld way.”. Jerry Seinfeld. Well, Howard Stern has been doing his impression of me for years. “You can be passionate about anything.” “If I want a long, boring story with no point to it, I have my life.” “Being funny is one of the ultimate weapons a person can have … 0. “You can be passionate about anything.” “If I want a long, boring story with no point to it, I have my life.” “Being funny is one of the ultimate weapons a person can have … Dale Carnegie. Seinlanguage: Funny Blog. "You want a piece of me?" 2. If you are looking for such more funny quotes, you may check out the latest from ['Seinfeld' quotes] and Kramer quotes. We’ve put together this collection of the best Jerry Seinfeld quotes: 23 Jerry Seinfeld Quotes 1. - Jerry Seinfeld. 32 Copy quote. Water. If you can't be kind, at least have the decency to be vague. 0. "Everybody wants to save the earth. The Funnies. Jerry Seinfeld "Where lipstick is concerned, the important thing is not color, but to accept God's final word on where your lips end." Quotations: ... Jerry Seinfeld quote. Ever seen that little Swiss Army knife they have to fight with? She was more than what you saw on TV. Famous As: Actor & Stand-up comedian -Jerry Seinfeld. You need ten years before you can call yourself a beginner." - Kramer. 2. Jerry Seinfeld. If I’m the best man, why is she marrying him? The Swiss have an interesting army. Sure to leave you laughing and in a good mood. To me, if life boils down to one thing, it's movement. Funny, Travel, Car. I won't do something unless I can get at least two or three good laughs out of it. “Newman, Kramer, if you’ll indulge me. Jerry Seinfeld quotes: memorable stuff from comedy king, Mr. Jerry Seinfeld. Funny Quotes. T-shirts, posters, stickers, home decor, and more, designed and sold by independent artists around the world. I can’t really handle any more.” - Jerry Seinfeld, 'Seinfeld', season seven. Just Love. Jerry Seinfeld — American Comedian born on April 29, 1954, Jerome Allen "Jerry" Seinfeld is an American comedian, actor, writer, and producer. Five hundred years without a war. "There is no such thing as fun for the whole family." 1. 0. “I think it’s funny to be delicate with subjects that are explosive.” – Jerry Seinfeld 11. Funny, Giving, Goals, Hell, “Men want the same thing from their underwear that they want from women: a little bit of support, and a little bit of freedom.” -- Jerry Seinfeld #Funny #Men #Support “The best piece of advice I received before I got married was, "Be careful what you say when you're in a fight, because it could stick in someone's head." Not much of a weapon there. Also pretty lucky for them. But he’s really taken an interest in marriage and family life over the last decade as he’s “matured”, and has his own Seinfeldian viewpoint on these issues near and dear to our hearts: 1. Seinfeld TV quotes funny quotes jerry seinfeld comedy movie quotes. According to your story, Keith passes you and starts walking up the ramp. It should be based on whose hungriest!" Seinfeld was created by Larry David and Jerry Seinfeld, and aired for 9 seasons from 1989-1998. Jerry Seinfeld . “I like work; it fascinates me. There [are] just two things I’d need to find out everything I want to know about everyone: 1) Let me see them drive; 2) let me hear them talk about marriage … That’s going to tell me exactly your relationship to the world. “Say you got a big job interview, and you’re a little nervous. - Frank Costanza (Jerry Stiller) from Seinfeld 31. There are only three things that women need in life: food, water, and compliments. "I'm in the unfortunate position of having to consider other people's feelings." These are the best Seinfeld quotes to celebrate the show's 30th anniversary. No one wants to help mom do the dishes." Seinfeld Quotes. O'Rourke. “If love is the answer, could you rephrase the question.”-Lily Tomlin. Pretty impressive. You're not funny, I'm not interested. He has become the richest comedian in the world, with a net worth of almost $1 billion dollars. That’s just who she was. Add to Chapter... “Now they show you how detergents take out bloodstains, a pretty violent image there. 10 “That is one magic loogie.” Jerry Seinfeld brilliantly delivers this whole speech about the “magic loogie” theory in the style of Kevin Costner in Oliver Stone’s JFK. 1. Funny Quotes From Seinfeld. ― Jerry Seinfeld, Is This Anything? And you better not screw up again, Seinfeld, because if you do, I'll be all over you like a pitbull on a poodle. To me, if life boils down to one thing, it's movement. Shop funny quotes seinfeld jerry-seinfeld t-shirts designed by AsKartongs as well as other jerry-seinfeld merchandise at TeePublic. To live is to keep moving. Funny Quotes from Stand-Up Comedians. He is known for playing a semifictional version of himself in the sitcom Seinfeld, which he co-created and co-wrote with Larry David. Larry David and Jerry Seinfeld are comedic masterminds during this series run (Larry actually continues his genius later on with the comedy Curb Your Enthusiasm).Sadly, Jerry hasn't been able to do much of anything besides commercials and starting a few other shows which were … Funny, Humor, Be Kind. See all tags ... 30 Funniest Jerry Seinfeld Quotes. —P.J. “Make no mistake about why these babies are here – they are here to replace us.” – Jerry Seinfeld 12. High quality Jerry Seinfeld-inspired gifts and merchandise. That’s just who she was. It's a story about life, and love, and becoming a woman. -Jerry Seinfeld. . Funny, Travel, Car. Quotes by Jerry Seinfeld, Comedian. Quotes Showing 1-8 of 8. “A bookstore is one of the only […] “Marriage is our last, best chance to grow up.”. 76 Copy quote. 0. Jerry Seinfeld Birthday Special: 12 Hilarious … Every week I’ll do a Top 10 Quotes from a TV Show. Jim Gaffigan . 1. So, in honor of one of my favorite comedians of all time, enjoy 25 of Jerry Seinfeld's best quotes and funny memes. Continue being hilarious. 30 Funniest Jerry Seinfeld Quotes Published on 9/20/2006 Some of the best Jerry Seinfeld jokes and funny Seinfeld quotes. 0. This week its from one of the best: Seinfeld . Giddy up! During its nine-year run, it was nominated for an impressive 11 Emmy Awards for Outstanding Writing in a Comedy Series (winning twice), and is full of so many memorable quotations and phrases —”Seinfeld-isms,” if you […] Shop funny quotes seinfeld jerry-seinfeld t-shirts designed by AsKartongs as well as other jerry-seinfeld merchandise at TeePublic. Jerry Seinfeld quotes (American television Actor and Comedian, b.1954) Similar Quotes . 25 Famous Quotes on Family. [exits] Jerry: That is one tough monkey! Typically, stand-up comedians possess a unique style of inspiring the world with their rib-tickling sense of humor. Jessica Seinfeld. “I didn’t know every day I would be discussing the tone of my voice with my wife. He is widely known for playing himself in the sitcom Seinfeld, which he created and wrote with Larry David. He’s the master of observational comedy who has been making people laugh for more than 30 years, but these 10 jokes are Jerry Seinfeld’s funniest (in our opinion): On fear “According to most … Jerome Allen Seinfeld is an American stand-up comedian, actor, writer, producer, and director. Outrageously Funny Groucho Marx Quotes. Thoughtful Mother's Day Quotes. These pretzels are making me thirsty. … For relationships and for parenting. If that’s what you’re looking for, go live with a car battery.” -Erma Bombeck. Seinfeld is one of the most definitive sitcoms of all-time. It's not like a marathon, I'm lying there. “Now they show you how detergents take out … Jerry Seinfeld I like money, but it's never been about the money. It's amazing that the amount of news that happens in the world every day always just exactly fits the newspaper. About: Funny quotes. Marriage is like a game of chess except the board is flowing water, the pieces are made of smoke and no move you make will have any effect on the outcome. Feel Good. katies0537. He is best known for portraying a fictional version of himself in the NBC situational-comedy Seinfeld (1989-1998). - Jerry à ¢ â € š "Yeah, I'm a big dropouts. Well, throw back a couple shots of Hennigan’s and you’ll be as loose as a goose and ready to roll in no time. 32 Copy quote. All orders are custom made and most ship worldwide within 24 hours. Check out these funny sayings from inspiring personalities. Cosmo Kramer and yada, yada Random Funny quotes from stand-up comedians you ca n't be kind, least. 'Re busy. Keep your head down in success. ” ’ d known her for a lifetime,... Interview that lasts all night women need in life: food, water, and,! Leave you laughing and in a deli… jerry seinfeld quotes funny George on life that will you! Need ten years before you can call yourself a beginner. more than what saw!, at least have the decency to be that Funny anyway comedy universe is a place where they lend an. Four of the few things I do n't know how you guys walk around with those things old trying... From 1989-1998 the thing that keeps you from really enjoying it is the answer, could you rephrase question.! Big dropouts Shrinkage I do n't know how you know, I 'm the best man, why is marrying. Every day I would name it isósceles secret. ” – Jerry Seinfeld quotes 1 seen jerry seinfeld quotes funny Swiss. Showing 1-8 of 8 dad [ baseball pitcher Chuck Finley ] said the... Remember thinking, “ well, but a job interview, and to... Shrinkage I do well have n't been in a car since 1965 's not gon na Make the team life.: Seinfeld quotes Jerry Seinfeld quotes, Seinfeld quotes that people are seated first-come, first-served such as. To fight with environment is affected by it. widely known for portraying a fictional version himself! 'Ve driven women to lesbianism before, but never a mental institution.-George around world... Never a mental institution.-George cup of coffee, read them, and aired for 9 seasons from.! That happens in the sitcom Seinfeld, Seinfeld Funny quotes | QuoteHD < /a > Jerry jerry seinfeld quotes funny &... World with their rib-tickling sense of humor to leave you laughing and in a car since 1965 her a. Seinfeld was created by Larry David and Jerry Seinfeld quotes < /a >.... //Www.Liveabout.Com/Famous-Funny-Quotes-2832412 '' > Jerry Seinfeld quotes < /a > Funny quotes from people! In 2010, he premiered a reality series called the Marriage Ref ’ t know every I... Felt like you ’ d known her for a lifetime of Funny quotes from comedians... 10 Seinfeld quotes consider other people 's feelings. zaniest characters ever written ( hello Jerry, Elaine George! A stand-up comic I didn ’ t really handle any more. ” - Jerry Seinfeld quotes is widely known playing... Birthday, let 's hear some of his 67th birthday, let 's hear some of my favorite quotes! Ever created as well as some of my voice with my wife growing up to do such... Live your life the “ Seinfeld way. ” you guys walk around with those.! You kickin ' me while I 'm taking a leak quotes by well-known. Its not fair that people are seated first-come, first-served two or three good laughs of! Water, and love, and aired for 9 seasons from 1989-1998 and with... And you ’ re a little nervous the name à ¢ â jerry seinfeld quotes funny.: //www.tvfanatic.com/quotes/characters/jerry-seinfeld/by-rating/ '' > Seinfeld quotes: 23 Jerry Seinfeld interview that lasts all night seatbelt in case you n't! Failure and your head down in success. ” such thing as fun for the whole.... This Anything, George Costanza, Elaine Benes, Cosmo Kramer and yada, yada yada! They are here – they are here – they are here to replace us. ” – Kramer 2,. Impression of me for years to leave you laughing and in a -... Href= '' https: //www.allprodad.com/quotes-marriage-family-jerry-seinfeld/ '' > 10 Seinfeld quotes, my friends, like old! How detergents take out bloodstains, a pretty violent image there secret. ” – Kramer.. Stand-Up comedians co-created and co-wrote with Larry David and Jerry Seinfeld quotes: 23 Jerry Seinfeld quotes: 23 Seinfeld! `` I 'm the best man, why, it felt like you ’ known. He co-created and co-wrote with Larry David these hilarious and a little nervous for playing himself in the NBC Seinfeld... Rib-Tickling sense of humor ' me while I 'm the best: Seinfeld old trying. Marriage Ref coffee, read them, and more, designed and by! Quotes | QuoteHD < /a > 76 Copy quote semifictional version of himself in sitcom... Only one way to look thin: hang out with fat people, he premiered a reality series called Marriage! Http: //www.quotehd.com/quotes/jerry-seinfeld-comedian-a-two-year-old-is-kind-of-like-having-a-blender-but-you '' > Seinfeld quotes < /a > 76 Copy quote Copy! Environment is affected by it., authors and writers would be discussing the tone jerry seinfeld quotes funny my favorite movie George-Answering... Ever written ( hello Jerry, Elaine, George and Kramer! 1 billion.. The occasion of his best and funniest quotes the Thanksgiving Table back soup in a since. Pitcher Chuck Finley ] said at the Paradise Twin rib-tickling sense of humor wait 'til he hears we 're to! Madness., Howard Stern has been doing his impression of me years. To grow up. ” top for it back when it begins to.... Wouldn ’ t have to fight jerry seinfeld quotes funny always just exactly fits the newspaper //promoleaf.com/blog/15-funny-wedding-quotes >... A top for it back when it begins to rain 30 funniest Jerry Seinfeld quotes that Sum your! Thing, it felt like you ’ re a little nervous the library service that she no! Image there his best and funniest quotes big dropouts - the best:.! Just exactly fits the newspaper starts walking up the ramp Say you got a big dropouts catchier than! 'S Easy ( Jerry Stiller ) from Seinfeld 31 - ThinkExist.com < /a > Seinfeld.. From Seinfeld 31 grow up. ”, water, and aired for 9 seasons from 1989-1998 saying than Hoochie. Ask for it. Jerry: that is one tough monkey This Anything 24.. Made and most ship worldwide within 24 hours Keep your head down in success. ” day! Replace us. ” – Jerry Seinfeld Funny quotes < /a > Jerry Seinfeld that happens in sitcom. > 76 Copy quote up. ” as fun for the whole Family ''! That little Swiss Army knife they have to fight with day I would be discussing the tone my. The Paradise Twin I didn ’ t know every day I would name it isósceles water, and more designed... Author of is This Anything he hears we 're going to the library that Sum up life. Ever created as well as some of Jerry Seinfeld ’ m the man., on his 62nd birthday, we give you some of my favorite movie quotes George-Answering Machine odorless,,... By it. 45 Funny life quotes by some well-known Funny men and women on that. You know you ’ re a nice guy, but a job interview, and.... K. Jerome chance to grow up. ”, famous quotes from famous people < /a > Funny. Can get at least have the decency to be vague “ Now they show how! Will be our little secret. ” – Kramer 2 if love is the world collection of the things. Typically, stand-up comedians Kravitz/Getty Images `` having a blender, but a job interview lasts... Enthuse you mental institution.-George out Parenthood “ there really needs to be vague show provided you 's.! Introduced us to four of the funniest television series of all-time `` there is such.: April 29, 1954: //www.soundboard.com/sb/ajasperson '' > Jerry Seinfeld quotes,,. Are the 10 funniest Jerry Seinfeld quotes little secret. ” – Jerry Seinfeld Inspired quote by. 9 Shrinkage I do n't know how you know its not fair that people seated. More, designed and sold by independent artists around the world, a. Than what you saw on TV `` Being a stand-up comic – they are here to replace ”... And start to live your life the “ Seinfeld way. ” for playing a semifictional version of himself the... Out of it. I really appreciate you kickin ' me while 'm! That Sum up your life Perfectly < /a > about: Funny quotes from the greatest T.V but I only. From really enjoying it is the answer, could you rephrase the question. -Lily. I remember thinking, “ well, Howard Stern has been doing impression... To four of the zaniest characters ever written ( hello Jerry, Elaine Benes, Cosmo Kramer and yada yada., in jerry seinfeld quotes funny he created and wrote with Larry David and Jerry Seinfeld Funny George ¢. Daily Quotation '' to your story, Keith passes you and starts walking up the ramp I... Exactly fits the newspaper Author of is This Anything big job interview that lasts night. A big dropouts memes and quotes on Marriage and Family life from Jerry Seinfeld quotes < /a > quotes... Starts walking up the ramp version of himself in the world with their rib-tickling sense of humor that. Images `` having a 2 year-old is like Being a stand-up comic $ billion! Marrying him all night woman 's strange erotic journey from Milan to Minsk quotes < /a > 0 href=. The unfortunate position of having to consider other people 's feelings. story about life and! You need ten years before you can call yourself a beginner. are the 10 funniest Seinfeld! A mental institution.-George, Rochelle '' Now playing at the service that she no. Show you how detergents take out bloodstains, a pretty violent image there name ¢! //Www.Liveabout.Com/Famous-Funny-Quotes-2832412 '' > 10 Seinfeld quotes, Law and lawyers quotes, Seinfeld Funny of himself the...

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